First, blet your medlar.

Pheasant day! A little bit scared of the pheasant if I'm honest. I had a bad experience with a Romney Marsh wild mallard once and have been a little wary of game ever since. But the pheasant was on deal with Abel & Cole (£3.05) so was delivered in a sheep's wool insulated box (very clever) with the veg on Wednesday. Also, I have an excuse to eat crisps with it. Or game chips. Or whatever. It's traditional.

There was a discussion at work about the latticed game chip. Some are latticed. Why? I don't know. I'm thinking maybe there is a game chip social divide. Those who lattice and those who don't. I don't. Pictured is the closest I could find in Waitrose. Not close at all.

But a medlar. What's a medlar? Think of a squat brown pear with a thingy like a pomegranate. You know what I mean. But it's not a pear. A rarely seen fruit now confined to National Trust properties, comfortable middle-class gardens and rambling ancestral piles. The fruit itself is rather hard and astringent until 'bletted'. This can be done by leaving the fruit on the tree or picked and stored eye-down in a nice, dark place until the fruit is soft and squishy. Rather like a very over-ripe pear. I enjoy finding medlar trees and walnut trees. Simple things!

The pheasant was cooked a la Nigel Slater with apples, butter and thyme. And this was all prepped and cooked in under an hour!

Pheasant rubbed with thyme butter and roasted with apples and a little lemon juice. Medlar jelly melted in the pan juices with a little extra butter. This was an excellent use of the jar of homemade medlar jelly from my mother. Thanks Mum!

Served with carrots and Burt's Chips. Burt's are amazing and most definitely helped me through 12hr shifts when working for Oddbins.

Channelling Masterchef's Gregg Wallace- soft, thyme-flavoured meat, sweet carrots, salty, crunchy game chips, buttery apples.

I'm quite proud! And will never be thin.

All this eaten to The Big Fish Fight. Very wise words in the typically upfront Hugh style. Eat happy fish.